Things Kindergartners Say

February 5, 2017

The great thing about raising a five-year-old is that your world is place of wonder and imagination. It is also a place of high drama and inquisition. As a parent it can be a tough world to understand, but thankfully for us out little zoologist is quite verbose. No doubt the day will come when we have to spend time trying to get him to talk to us to reveal his feelings, but that day was not today. Here are the things the zoologist says on a day like today.

 

“Sweet Sassafras.”

-This one is taken straight from the Sherriff Callie binge he has been on. What made it hilarious is that he uttered this just after walking out of the bathroom.

 

“Let’s talk about octurnal animals.”

-He meant nocturnal, but the great thing is that he then began to rattle off everything he knew about nocturnal animals, which was far more knowledge than I possess on the topic.

 

“What is a software update?”

-You would think being in IT this would have been easier to answer than it was.

 

“This is not my favorite life right now.”

-A meltdown over a contentious twisty straw controversy between the zoologist and the three-year-old ballerina gave us this jewel.

 

“I’m too cold for the fireplace to not be on.”

-The zoologist loves the fireplace. He wants it on as soon as it dips below 80 degrees.

 

“I don’t think Manny likes that.”

-Around supper time daddy dropped a human hydrogen bomb. I have to confess that it was a bit of a stinker. Rather than openly confronting daddy’s attack on the olfactory senses he chose to let his beloved lovie do it.

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